Monday, January 19, 2009

honesty again

Paul (over at the Sola Panel) and Jean have resurrected our discussion about honesty, sharing and over sharing from earlier in the year.

To get you up to speed... Paul points out very helpfully that confessing sin to eachother can actually be a devious way of avoiding dealing with the sin and appearing righteous and humble before others. What he says resonates painfully.
"You're sitting in church feeling a little more nervous than normal. If you had known that the sermon was going to be about that, you might have decided to stay in bed this morning. But there it is, front and centre on the service outline. What should you do? Thinking at a speed that would normally startle you, you hit upon the perfect strategy: talk to others about ‘it’ before they talk to you. If you start the conversation and talk about how you struggle with ‘it’ before they raise the topic, you're home free! People will think you're godly and open, and you'll be able to walk away feeling good about yourself without having to change a thing. The best defence is a good offence."
Jean has some helpful suggestions to guide our 'honesty' with others. My favourite is that honesty is not an end in itself, but a beginning.

Back when I did my original post, a commenter said what I think is the most helpful thing. There are many things which may not and should not be shared with others - not even with the most trusted and mature christian friend. But there is an outlet. Private prayer.
"What can never enter the corporate prayer of the fellowship may here be silently made known to God." Life Together p64 Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Jesus knows our troubles more fully than we do, he sympathizes with our weakness, pleads to God for our forgiveness and strengthens us that we might change. May we be most honest and open with him.

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